Wisdom behind the plural marriage (polyogomy)

1 – Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah

(nation, Muslim community).

It is known that the numbers can only be increased through marriage, and the number of offspring gained through plural marriage will be greater than that achieved through marriage to one wife.

Wise people know that increasing the number of offspring will strengthen the ummah and increase the number of workers in it, which will raise its economic standard – if the leaders run the affairs of state well and make use of its resources in a proper manner. Ignore the claims of those who say that increasing the numbers of human beings poses a danger to the earth’s resources which are insufficient, for Allaah the Most Wise Who has prescribed plural marriage has guaranteed to provide provision for His slaves and has created on earth what is more than sufficient for them. Whatever shortfall exists is due to the injustice of administrations, governments and individuals, and due to bad management. Look at China, for example, the greatest nation on earth as far as number of inhabitants is concerned, and it is regarded as one of the strongest nations in the world, and other nations would think twice before upsetting China; it is also one of the great industrialized nations. Who would dare think of attacking China, I wonder? And why?

2 – Statistics show that the number of women is greater than the number of men;

if each man were to marry just one woman, this would mean that some women would be left without a husband, which would have a harmful effect on her and on society:

The harmful effect is that she would never find a husband to take care of her interests, to give her a place to live, to spend on her, to protect her from haraam desires, and to give her children to bring her joy. This may lead to deviance and going astray, except for those on whom Allaah has mercy.

With regard to the harmful effects on society, it is well known that this woman who is left without a husband may deviate from the straight path and follow the ways of promiscuity, so she may fall into the swamp of adultery and prostitution – may Allaah keep us safe and sound – which leads to the spread of immorality and the emergence of fatal diseases such as AIDS and other contagious diseases for which there is no cure. It also leads to family breakdown and the birth of children whose identity is unknown, and who do not know who their fathers are.

Those children do not find anyone to show compassion towards them or any mature man to raise them properly. When they go out into the world and find out the truth, that they are illegitimate, that is reflected in their behaviour, and they become exposed to deviance and going astray. They may even bear grudges against society, and who knows? They may become the means of their country’s destruction, leaders of deviant gangs, as is the case in many nations in the world.

3 – Men are exposed to incidents that may end their lives, for they work in dangerous professions.

They are the soldiers who fight in battle, and more men may die than women. This is one of the things that raise the percentage of husbandless women, and the only solution to this problem is plural marriage.

4 – There are some men who may have strong physical desires, for whom one wife is not enough.

If the door is closed to such a man and he is told, you are not allowed more than one wife, this will cause great hardship to him, and his desire may find outlets in forbidden ways.

In addition to that, a woman menstruates each month, and when she gives birth, she bleeds for forty days (this post-partum bleeding is called nifaas in Arabic), at which time a man cannot have intercourse with his wife, because intercourse at the time of menstruation or nifaas is forbidden, and the harm that it causes has been proven medically.
So plural marriage is permitted when one is able to be fair and just.

5 – Plural marriage does not exist only in the Islamic religion, rather it was known among the previous nations.

Some of the Prophets were married to more than one woman. The Prophet of Allaah Sulaymaan (Solomon) had ninety wives. At the time of the Prophet S.A.W (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), there were some men who became Muslims who had eight or five wives. The Prophet S.A.W(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told them to keep four wives and to divorce the rest.

6 – A wife may be barren, or she may not meet her husband’s needs, or he may be unable to have intercourse with her because she is sick.

A husband may long to have children, which is a legitimate desire, and he may want to have a sex life within marriage, which is something permissible, and the only way is to marry another wife. It is only fair for the wife to agree to remain his wife and to allow him to marry another.

7 – A woman may be one of the man’s relatives and have no one to look after her,

and she is unmarried or a widow whose husband has died, and the man may think that the best thing to do for her is to include her in his household as a wife along with his first wife, so that he will both keep her chaste and spend on her. This is better for her than leaving her alone and being content only to spend on her.

8 – There are other shar’i interests that call for plural marriages,

such as strengthening the bonds between families, or strengthening the bonds between a leader and some of his people or group, and he may think that one of the ways of achieving this aim is to become related to them through marriage, even if that is through plural marriage.

plural marriage in Islam

In Malaysia, the term plural marriage (having more than a wife - polyogomy) is become a big debut, even bigger issue than the muslim collapse in the world of islamic country. 
The shar’i text which permits plural marriage is: 

Allaah has allowed men to have more than one wife, as 
He says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice”

[al-Nisa’ 4:3] 

This clearly shows that plural marriage is permissible, and that according to Islamic sharee’ah a man may marry one, two, three or four wives, but it is not permissible for him to marry more than four. This is the view of the mufassireen and fuqaha’; the Muslims are unanimously agreed on this point and there is no difference of opinion. 

Nonetheless, among the muslin entitiy itself there are some or most follower who really do not fully understand the concept of plural marrige brought by Islam. Not just a marriage, Islam has put weightage or requirment for the husband to fullfil before he proceed to have many wives.

1 – Justice and fairness. 

Because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one” [al-Nisa’ 4:3]. 
This verse shows that justice is a condition of plural marriage being permissible. If a man fears that he will not be able to treat his wives fairly if he marries more than one, then it is forbidden for him to marry more than one. What is meant by justice here is treating all wives equally with regard to spending, clothing, staying overnight and other material matters which are within his ability to control. 

With regard to justice and equal treatment in the area of love, he is not held accountable for that, and it is not required of him because it is not possible to control it. This is what is meant by the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): 

“You will never be able to do perfect justice between wives even if it is your ardent desire”

[al-Nisa’ 4:129] 

i.e., with regard to love of the heart. 

2 – Being able to afford spending on plural wives. 

The evidence for this is the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allaah enriches them of His Bounty”

[al-Noor 24:33] 

In these verses Allaah commands the one who is able to get married but cannot afford it to remain chaste. One of the reasons for not be able to afford to get married is not having enough to pay the mahr (dowry) or not being able to spend on one’s wife.
Al-Mufassal fi Ahkaam al-Mar’ah, vol. 6, p. 286. 

Some of the scholars are of the view that plural marriage is better than restricting oneself to one wife.

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked: Is the basic principle concerning marriage plural marriage or marriage to one wife? He replied: The basic principle in sharee’ah is plural marriage for those who can afford it, if there is no fear of injustice, because of the many interests that are served by that, such as keeping himself and those whom he marries chaste, kind treatment of them, producing lots of children and increasing the numbers of the ummah and the numbers of those who worship Allaah alone. This is indicated by the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice”

[al-Nisa’ 4:3] 

And because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) married more than one wife, and Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Indeed in the Messenger of Allaah (Muhammad) you have a good example to follow”

[al-Ahzaab 33:21] 

One of the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “As for me, I will not eat meat,” and another said, “As for me I will pray and never sleep”; another said, “As for me I will fast and never break my fast,” and another said: “As for me, I will never marry women.” When news of that reached him, the Prophet  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) addressed the people. He praised Allaah then he said: “You are the ones who said such and such. As for me, by Allaah, I fear Allaah more than you do, but I fast and I break my fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. Whoever turns away from my Sunnah has nothing to do with me.” These great words of the Prophet  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) include both marriage to one woman and plural marriage

Majallat al-Balaagh, issue no. 1015; Fataawa ‘Ulama al-Balad al-Haraam, p. 386.-Mar’ah, part 6, p. 286). 

Sekiranya aku.....

Ya Tuhanku...
Aku sering berfikir sendirian ....
Sekiranya aku mempunyai kuasa yang melebihi kuasa manusia biasa...
Kau kurniakan padaku...
akan ku hapuskan tentera yahudi dgn sekelip mata...
akan ku hapuskan pemerintah Amerika yang pendusta itu..
akan aku berdepan dengan kemungkaran...

Namun aku berfikir sekali lagi....
Mengapa Engkau tidak memberi kuasa luar biasa kepada hambamu...
sesungguhnya terlalu banyak hikmah..
untuk tidak memiliki daripada memiliki...

Tuhan ku, 
walaupun aku seorang manusia biasa juga aku sering lupa kepadamu,
apetah lagi jika aku mempunyai kuasa melebihi manusia,
Maha suci ALLAH yang mengetahui segala yang tersembunyi,

Tiada mampu ku perbuat selain berdoa kepadaMU 
lindungilah tentera islam yang sedang berjuang menentang tentera kafir..
bersihkan hati mereka sebagaimana kau memohon agar di bersih kan hati kotorku ya ALLAH
tetapkan hati mereka ya ALLAH.

peringatan buat pusat zakat

Dalam dua minggu lepas, aku temankan seorang sahabat. Sahabat aku tu, kerjanya wartawan. Tak payahlah aku sebutkan suratkhabar mana, atau majalah mana. Malam Itu, dia ajak aku temankan dia berjumpa dengan seorang ibu tunggal yang juga seorang muallaf.

Dipendekkan cerita, pertemuan kami malam tu, penuh dengan keluh kesah. Aku kesian betul tengok nasib akak tu. Tentang nasibnya yang malang. Kisahnya tentang terima ujian Allah yang datang bertimpa-timpa bila dia memeluk Islam.

Tapi, yang paling aku tak tahan, bila dia bercerita tentang pusat zakat. Menyirap aku dengar cerita akak tu. Paling tak syok sekali, kata akak tu, pusat zakat layan orang-orang macamnya (muallaf) macam layan anjing kurap!

"Bila ada orang Melayu, dia orang dahulukan orang Melayu biarpun kami yang datang dulu. Mana adil macam ni. Islam tak pernah ajar utamakan bangsa. Islam ajar kita tentang keadilan. Saya tahulah, kerani tu bangsa Melayu, tapi dia pekerja institusi agama, dia tak bolehlah jadi berat sebelah. Bila dia buat macam tu, hilang respek saya.

"Ada banyak lagilah perangai-perangai dia orang yang buatkan kami kecil hati. Bahasa dia orang pada kami pun semacam aja kasarnya. Kadang-kadang rasa menyampah nak berurusan dengan pusat zakat. Letih naik turun lif berkali-kali pasa birokrasi. Sampai saya pernah terfikir, kalau macam ni layanan orang Islam pada saudara baru, baik saya tukar agama lain,"

Bila aku dengar cerita akak tu, teringat semasa aku bersembang dengan orang kuat PERKIM, Ustaz Ann Wan Seng. Masa kami bersembang, ketika berbual-bual tentang topik zakat, Ustaz Ann Wan Seng berceritalah tentang ramainya saudara-saudara baru yang mengadu. Adu mereka, pusat zakat layan mereka macam anjing kurap.

Dan malam ni, sekali lagi aku dengar kenyataan macam itu, keluar dari mulut seorang saudara baru.

Kadang-kadang, pusat zakat ni pun satu. Yang berlagak tak tentu pasal tu pasal apa? Kadang-kadang yang berlagak ni, bukan orang berpangkat, tetapi kerani-kerani biasa ni. Dia orang ni yang lebih-lebih tunjuk belang. Aku rasa la kan, pekerja-pekerja pusat zakat ni kena 'sekolah'kan sikit ler. Bagi diaorang faham, zakat tu apa, untuk siapa dan kenapa ada sistem zakat...

note: inilah dia sikap orang melayu kita...suka pilih bulu..pusat zakat nih pun macam tuh...kira sedara JAKIM jugak la nih...tak buat kerja, tapi bila di tanya , kerja banyak melambak....tak ingatke diaorang bila kena jawab kat padang mahsyar nanti....


hukum orang islam mengucap selamat kepada perayaan agama lain

Perhatian: jawapan ini jangan dipakai, diheret dalam hujah perbincangan, sebab ia cuma hadir sekadar mengisi ruang kekosongan. Semoga jawapan ini salah. Oleh sebab itu khalayak tak layak memegang pendapat ini dengan sekuat-kuatnya.

sebelum menghuraikan persoalan ini, biar saya rumuskan satu formula; amalan kita harus berdiri di atas nama maruah dan persahabatan, kasih sayang.

Untuk memudahkan kefahaman ini, rujuk kisah sumpah Nabi Ayub a.s yang menghukum isterinya.

Ketika Ayub a.s sembuh daripada penyakit, baginda mahu hukum isteri dengan 100 kali sebatan. Bagaimanapun atas kasih sayang Allah maka, diperintahkan Ayyub mencari 100 helai rumput kering yang diikat menjadi satu ikatan lalu dipukul isterinya hanya dengan sekali sebatan sahaja. Dengan itu, hukuman itu dianggap selesai.

Sebenarnya, isteri nabi Ayub tidak layak dihukum kerana kesalahan isterinya itu justeru untuk meringankan beban kehidupan mereka sehari-hari. Tetapi, oleh kerana Nabi Ayub telah bersumpah atas nama Allah, maka hal itu mesti diteruskan juga.

Tapi, kalau isteri Nabi Ayub itu tidak dihukum, menurut hemat saya, maka maruah nama Allah akan direndah-rendahkan. Jadi, mesti dihukum juga. Namun, kalau terus dihukum dengan 100 kali sebatan, itu zalim namanya kerana kesalahan isteri Nabi Ayub itu terkait dengan ihsan, kasih sayang si isteri terhadap suaminya.

Maka, hukum tetap dilaksanakan atas nama MARUAH. Tapi dalam masa yang sama, hukuman itu telah diringankan ke tahap minima atas nama KASIH SAYANG.

Kembali kita kepada isu hukum mengucapkan Selamat Hari Natal.

Pendapat mengenai hukum mengucapkan Selamat Natal
Seperti yang termaklum, secara ringkasnya hukum ini terbelah kepada dua bahagian.

Ada dua pendapat dalam permasalahan ini:

1. Ibnu Taimiyah, Ibnu al-Qayyim, para pengikut dan ulamak yang lainnya berpendapat bahawa hukum mengucap selamat Hari Natal adalah haram karena perayaan ini adalah antara syiar Kristian. Dan pengucapan selamat itu dilihat sebagai tasyabbuh (menyerupai) dan atas dasar ini, maka ia diharamkan.

Mereka juga berpendapat wajib menjauhi berbagai perayaan orang-orang kafir, menjauhi sikap menyerupai perbuatan-perbuatan mereka, tidak menolong seorang Muslim dalam menyerupai perayaan hari raya mereka, tidak mengucapkan selamat atas hari raya mereka serta menjauhi penggunaan berbagai nama dan istilah khusus didalam ibadah mereka.

2. Jumhur ulama masa kini membolehkan pengucapan Hari Natal, antaranya Dr Yusuf al-Qaradhawi yang berpendapat bahwa perubahan masa menjadikan dia berbeza pandangan dengan Ibnu Taimiyah.

Al-Qaradhawi membolehkannya apabila mereka adalah orang-orang yang lembut ke atas Muslimin, lebih-lebih lagi apabila ada hubungan kejiranan, teman sekuliah, sepejabat dan lain-lainnya. Hal ini termasuk dalam berbuat kebajikan yang tidak dilarang Allah.

Tidak dilarang bagi seorang muslim atau badan Islam memberi selamat atas perayaan ini, baik dengan lisan atau pun pengiriman kad ucapan yang tidak menampilkan simbol mereka atau berbagai ungkapan keagamaan yang bertentangan dengan prinsip-prinsip Islam seperti salib. Ucapan-ucapan yang digunakan dalam pemberian ucapan selamat ini pun haruslah yang tidak mengandungi unsur pengukuhan ke atas agama mereka.

Tidak dilarang menerima hadiah mereka karena sesungguhnya Nabi s.a.w telah menerima berbagai hadiah dari bukan Muslim seperti al-Muqouqis Pemimpin al Qibthi di Mesir dan juga yang lainnya dengan syarat bahawa hadiah itu bukan yang diharamkan seperti arak, daging babi dan lainnya.

Antara para ulama yang membolehkan hal ini adalah Dr Abdus Sattar Fathullah Sa’id, Dr. Muhammad Sayyid Dasuki, Ustadz Musthafa az Zarqo serta Syeikh Muhammad Rasyid Ridha. (www.islamonline.net)

Tapi, mengikuti program Natal bersama bagi umat Islam hukumnya haram. Supaya umat Islam tidak terjerumus kepada syubhat dan larangan Allah, maka dianjurkan untuk tidak mengikuti kegiatan-kegiatan perayaan Natal.

Berkasih sayang penganut Kristian, tapi maruah Islam harus dipelihara
Namun, sikap baik kepada mereka bukan bererti harus kita terjun dalam prinsip agama, dalam lingkungan aqidah mereka.

Kembali kepada formula awal tadi. Sikap, pendirian dan amalan kita mestilah berteraskan kepada maruah dan kasih sayang. Atas nama kasih sayang, boleh hadir dalam jamuan mereka, tetapi untuk mengangkat doa, mengaminkan bacaan doa mereka, maka hal itu tidak diperlukan, kerana ini bersangkutan maruah agama.

Lihat juga bagaimana dalam kes-kes Rasulullah s.a.w bertindak ketika berdepan dengan orang-orang bukan Islam. Ada waktu-waktunya, seperti baginda mengalah, berkompromi tetapi dalam hal lain, baginda bertegas.

Dalam kes Hudaibiyyah, baginda mengalah kerana hal itu tidak terkait dengan hal ibadat. Tapi, baginda enggan mengalah dan tunduk kepada permintaan yang mahu berkompromi soal ibadat, misalnya hari ini Rasulullah s.a.w menyembah berhala bersama-sama orang-orang kafir manakala esoknya orang kafir akan menyertai nabi menyembah Allah.

Hal ini nabi tolak melalui penyataan: ‘Lakum diinukum wa liya deen.’ (Kamu dengan hal agamamu, aku dengan urusan agamaku.)

Demikian juga ketika nabi dipujuk untuk diserahkan wanita, harta termasuklah diangkat sebagai pemimpin, maka nabi menolak ajakan tersebut kerana syaratnya ialah tinggalkan urusan dakwah Islam ini.

Ringkasnya, dalam hal maruah, tiada kompromi. Tetapi, kita mestilah raikan saudara non Muslim atas nama kasih sayang dengan menziarahi mereka jikalau ada jemputan kenduri, acara makan dan minum petang di rumah mereka.

Sebenarnya, agak sulit untuk non Muslim memahami beberapa perkara dalam Islam ini kerana ruang untuk mereka faham ini agak terbatas dan pendidikan kita tidak menjurus kepada usaha untuk memahamkan non Muslim di negara ini terhadap agama Islam.